Arrows quilt for baby girl Moridi!

A good friend of mine just had a baby girl and I wanted to make something for her that was both special and practical. I love quilts as they accomplish both, but they require so much work and time that I only make them for those I know will really love and use them. 

I found the instructions for this pattern on Pinterest, at  fortworthfabricstudio.blogspot.com The instructions were simple, easy to follow and included a diagram that was very helpful. I love that this quilt looks more complicated than it is. 

I chose to quilt it in varying sizes of circles, as I thought it was a nice juxtaposition to the hard lines of the arrows. It also mimicked the tiny circles of the blue, pink and black fabric. I simply traced three different sizes of mixing bowls, using pencil, on the back of the quilt and then machine stitched over the pencil marks. I finished it using a French binding, because that is what I know best. The whole thing was sewn on my Swiss made 26 year old Bernina Bernette. Proving that appliances NOT 

made in China, can last a very long time!

Eve's 3rd Pixie Themed Birthday Party

There are many things to love about being a Mom, & planning & throwing birthday parties is certainly on that list.  I have documented all of our little girl's birthday parties & I keep meaning to post them...but alas, procrastination always gets the better of me. So I might have to work in reverse.

The trickiest part of planning a party for a wee one, in my opinion, is nailing down the theme. I tried to coax her into a certain direction, I thought Rapunzel would be fun. She thought so too, for about a week. Then it was Dinosaur Train, creative but again, fleeting. She recently discovered Tinker Bell and all her little fairy friends so that was what we finally settled on. She only faltered from the plan a few times in the month leading up to the party...let's see there was a Flynn Party (from Tangled, that would have been interesting) & of course there was a major Mom fail at Party City where she was heartbroken to hear that she would not be having an Ariel party. But after a few tears (& maybe a bribe to get us back to Team Tink) all was set & we were on our way to Pixie Hollow!

It was a small affair since we don't have that many friends in California yet, but the party was a hit & it was a great group of kids & adults.

I found these super cute invites on Etsy at Double Trouble Ink

For the decorations I kept it really simple this year. I bought reusable Tink & Friends stickers, which I moved to Eve's room after the party, a few dangly sparkling things, balloons, some fresh flowers & the 'Thanks Fairy Much For Coming' sign which I made the night before with some of Eve's water colors. For the favors each little fairy got a Tink cup filled with goodies, a pink wand...& of course, fairy wings!!! They got to choose between green or hot pink wings.

Needless to say, the fairy wings were a big hit & when all the girls took to the trampoline, the effect was magical! I'm not posting a picture of them all in flight because I don't have permission from all the moms, which I totally understand.

Our little birthday fairy.

The most important part of any party is of course the cake! I make a two layer sheet cake, chocolate & white a few days in advance & coat it with a 'dirty' layer of icing. The icing isn't actually dirty but the first layer gets little flecks of cake in it, so for decorating purposes it's best to do the dirty layer first & then add more later! I wrap it in foil & stick it in the freezer until the day before the party. 

 The day before the party I take the cake out of the freezer & leave it on the counter for a few hours to let it 'breathe' out any condensation that might get in the way of the decorating. I then give the cake another layer of buttercream icing, don't worry, I never get any complaints about the amount of icing on the cake, using a long metal spatula & a warm cup of water to make the top layer super smooth. For the decorators icing I use gel food coloring as it makes the icing vibrant & so pretty. 

The tree on the cake is supposed to be a pixie dust tree but I didn't make any yellow icing & by the time it occurred to me to make a pixie dust tree I didn't have any more icing left & I was not really in the mood to make a whole other batch just for a bit of yellow...so I went with bright orange! Next I  added Tink & her friends & then loosely wrapped it in foil & stuck it in the fridge until the morning of the party.

Proud parents with the birthday girl!

We had a wonderful day, but most importantly, Eve had a wonderful day filled with magic, good friends & of course...cake!

Water Bowl For Russia

I'm currently working on a new water bowl for our Nanny Russia. Her old one, that I absolutely adored, somehow didn't make it in the move😕

On the upside, I get to go to my favorite pottery painting shop in Los Gatos and make her a new one. 

In my grand tradition of trying something without practicing first, I have decided to do her bowl in happy blue and yellow bubbles. 

The technique is pretty simple: fill a bowl with a squeeze of hand soap, a heavier squeeze of paint and then add water and mix it up. Now grab a straw and pretend you're a kid with a giant colorful glass of milk and start blowing bubbles! Once you've made a bunch, scoop out a handful and lightly spread them on your piece. As the bubbles pop and dry they will reveal a fun and eclectic pattern. Something to the affect of this:

This is my first time doing this, so we'll see once it's fired if it still looks cool! Fingers crossed...I will post the finished product once it's finished!

Haiku of the Day

Lipoma. Oh no!
You are but a useless thing.
Make thyself scarce, bitch.

It Just Got Real

I grew up in Houston, and although I left as fast as a plane could take me when I was 18, I will always call Texas home. I have spent most of my life in Texas (aside from five years in NY, a year in Switzerland and six months in Australia) so our move to California is both exciting and scary. The thought of it leaves a bittersweet taste in my mouth as I think of the friends and family I so wish we could take with us.

When I picture California, I of course think of sunshine and the ocean but I also think of Stevie Nicks and Joni Mitchel. There's a sense of this easy bohemian lifestyle that seems so free and easy, like late afternoon sun. Now I'm sure babies wake up in the middle of the night there, the same as they do here, and our struggles will follow us like children, but there is something so intoxicating about leaving. And it's double since we're west coast bound. 

There have been, however, moments since Jonathan's birth and during the arduous process of moving that I have felt a little lost. That this experience is happening to me rather than with me. I'm still feeling a bit like a farm animal that is required to produce milk on demand. In a land where my personal hygiene comes second, (if at all) where sleep is a long lost dream and it's all to be done with a smile on my unwashed face. This and the fact that my day and night routine will not change much, I will just be doing it in a state with better weather. All good reasons to feel a bit down. 

But this is the part where getting over ones self becomes key to survival and counting ones blessings seems like a no-brainer. When the unforgiving late summer mugginess lifts from my tired eyes and I come to. This is incredible and life is good. Too good to hardly believe. I will miss Texas and the life we have forged here, but I cannot wait for the adventure before us. It will change our lives forever, as travel and new places always does, and it will be pure joy to watch the kids take it all in. In this moment I believe Robert Plant said it best, "Made up my mind, make a new start. Goin' to California with an achin' in my heart"...yes indeed Mr. Plant, thank you. 

'The Things You Can't Remember, To The Things You Can't Forget'

I love Tom Waits. That's a line from his song Calendar Girl, and although he is certainly not referencing being a new patent, I hear that song in my head and think of the beginning. 

So here is what I can't forget:

-The first 3 months are the hardest 

-Nobody tells you quite how hard it's going to be

-You get to fall in love all over again

-You start to fear the night

-The fatigue is real and it will not let you go

-Nursing a child is the most womanly thing you can do

-Getting them to sleep in their cribs, on their backs is a challenge 

-It is a magical time that will be over before you know it

-There is nothing like watching the man you love hold your baby

And this is what I couldn't remember:

-Just how hard it is...

-...but each week gets a little bit easier

-Showering is a luxury

-Being smelly is a given

-Crying for no reason...me, not the baby

-Successful burping is a myth, whoever said it was easy, lied

-Newborns make the cutest noises, crying is not one of them

-Recovering from major surgery is a lot easier with the distractions of caring for a baby

-Newborns are cryptic

-Newborns hate baths even more than dogs

-How wonderful it is to fall in love all over again

I mean really, how could you not fall in love with this? It is so worth the struggle. Every exhausted minute of it.

Well hello there stranger

I am the WORST blogger ever, I'm sorry little blog that I have neglected you for so long. If you'll have me, I'd really like to make this work. 

Ok, now that we're better on that front, my blog has decided to be forgiving;), it recently occurred to me that I suddenly have all this time that I could be spending here. No we didn't hire a nanny, send Eve to day care or finally let Russia be her primary caregiver...we had another baby! I know that sounds a little crazy pants, how can a second child give you more free time? But it has. It may not be at the most desirable time of day, (the middle of the night) but hey, I'll take what I can get. 

I'm currently nursing Jonathan who is 12 days old and trying very hard to let my husband sleep, since once he goes back to work I will have little choice there. So I have that time, roughly 30 min, and then another 30 min after to keep him upright, so all that hard work isn't wasted on spit up, to write! I admittedly have been spending copious amounts of time on Facebook and Instagram and have decided I should  cut that cord and write a bit instead. 

Jonathan, like I said, is 12 days old. Is up over his birth weight already, weighing in at 8lbs. 4oz. and is 21 inches long. By the grace of God he will actually sleep in his crib (complete opposite from his big sister who, in the beginning, would only sleep if being held). Also by some act of Devine mercy he so far does not suffer from day/night confusion. A phenomena I thought pure myth until we went through it with Eve for about a month. 3am and she was ready to party...it was awesome...actually it was so NOT awesome that I thought I was going to lose my mind. Anyone living through that right now, I feel your pain, just know it gets better. 

Jonathan hates getting his diaper changed and true to his gender would rather be dirty, but other than that he's a pretty chill little guy. We are falling more and more in love with him every minute and we count ourselves extremely blessed that he's healthy. 

Here we are, a family of four. And I am the happiest Momma. 

Hiking in New Mexico October 2013

Little Queen

Eve 12-18 months Spring-Fall 2013

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Eve, 18 months old

Super Easy, Super Cute Halloween Wreath!

With Halloween just a few weeks away it's almost time to dig out all your fun, spooky decor, brainstorm your next over the top costume, buy candy early, eat all the candy you bought early and have to buy MORE candy...surely I can't be the only one who does that...and get to act like a kid again!  What's not to love about Halloween!

Before we begin let me be very clear that this is an OUTDOOR project and it's best to do it on a day with little to no wind unless you want to spray paint yourself, your car, the neighbors dog or whatever else is nearby.

So let's get started! You will need:

• 1 twig wreath (any size)
• Black spray paint
• Shimmer spray paint in the color of your choice, I used purple
• Fun Halloween trinkets to bedazzle the wreath. I used spiders and a beware sign, but the options really are limitless.
• Newspaper or cardboard 
• Hot glue gun and glue sticks
• Gloves (optional if you want to keep your hands clean) 

Lay out the newspaper or cardboard to create your work space. Start by 'fluffing' the wreath. Twig wreaths are tightly wound and look better when pulled apart a bit.  It will also make it easier to get full coverage with the spray paint. Once you're happy with the way the wreath looks, start spraying!  (This is my favorite part) Layer the paint, alternating colors, until all sides of the wreath are covered.

Oh wait, this is my favorite part, break out your hot glue gun and decorate the wreath. And that's it, you're done.  Hang, enjoy and have a wonderfully spooky Halloween!!!!

Eve In Frog Pot

Eve is sunshine and unicorns all day long...the child floors me.  We were at Katie's not too long ago swimming in her pool and when we finished, Eve went over to an over sized frog shaped garden pot, found her way inside and gave it a big long hug. Sweet child stayed in just in time to take a picture...sublime.

Oh that face.

Happy 1st Birthday Sweet Girl!

I will blog the entire party as soon as I can channel some energy...and finish cleaning the house after Eve's fabulous party!

Zeppelin 2002-2013

When we woke in the early hours on Friday morning (March 1, 2013) to the sound of our dog crying we had no idea what the next fourteen hours would bring. Our beloved Zeppelin was suffering from severe cluster seizures and our only hope was getting him help before permanent damage had been done. We were at my in laws in New Braunfels and had difficulty finding a vet that would work us in, but after many phone calls, and one office closed due to a gas leak, we finally reached sympathetic ears. They immediately gave him a serious dose of Valium and started him on anti seizure medication with the hope that it would break the horrific cycle that was holding him hostage. They recommended we return home and get him to our vet asap, they told us our vet would probably keep him a few days for observation until they could get the dosage right for his medicine.

We made an appointment with our vet, the latest they could take us, and left for Houston as fast as we could. Zepp was seriously sedated when we set out, but soon after being on the road he started to have more seizures. Eve was terrified and crying, Matt was trying to stay calm and focus on getting us there safely, I was trying to console Zeppelin, and Russia had climbed to the front seat, thoroughly confused as to what was going on. It was not a pleasant four hour road trip. Houston traffic was typical for a Friday at five o'clock and we ended up an hour late to our appointment. Our vet and her staff stayed late to see us and we were only too thankful they did. She took him to a room but soon returned to the waiting area with tear filled eyes. She said the amount of drugs he was given should have broken the cycle of seizures but because it hadn't there was very little she could do. He had at that point suffered irreversible brain damage and even if he pulled through he would never be the same.

My emotional self told me to hang on, look for more answers, find another vet but my rational self said to end his suffering and say our goodbyes.  It is a decision that I will question for some time, but when the tears dry and the pain lessens I'm sure I will know that we made the choice that was right for Zeppelin.

At the darkest time of my life, when I was surrounded by tunnel, and there wasn't a light, Zeppelin stood beside me and would not leave me alone.  He and his sister Russia kept me warm, sane and happy when I had no right to be.  I always said that he loved me more than any man ever could, and as much as Matt loves me, I still believe that to be true.  I thank God that I was there right beside him in his darkest time, when he passed from this world to the next. In his last moments, when he couldn't even open his eyes exhausted from his ordeal, and left damaged beyond our repair, he lifted his head and placed it on my lap. He knew I was there.  And with him a piece of me died as well.  The pain that burrows through flesh and splinters bone like a weapon, feels as though it will never end, and my broken heart aches to be healed.

We have learned that he had some brain legion or tumor pressing on his brain that was incurable.  I feel helpless and out of control but I guess there is comfort knowing we did all that we could do for our sweet buddy.  Zeppelin was a special dog, I know everyone says that about their dog, but he really was.  Ask anyone who knew him.  He was vulnerable in the most endearing way, he was protective but neurotic, he was a medal winner of a 5K fun run race for dogs and his capacity to love was unmatched by anything I have seen. Oh, and he was particularly fond of the ladies...both human and canine.

Besides his legacy of unconditional love he leaves behind his sister Russia; who looks for him when we go outside but knows he will never return.  They were two parts to a whole, fire and water, and if I am hurting I can't begin to think what she must be going through. We have let her sleep in our bed since Friday, and if I had to guess that is where she will sleep until the end of her days.

I love you Buddy, you were more than a dog, you were more than family, you were a part of me that will never be replaced. The void you leave behind is vast and my only solace is knowing your suffering has ended. Watch us from your place in heaven as I know you to be the angelest of all the angels.

Every Girl Needs A Cape

I have a small addiction I feel the need to come clean about...I'm obsessed with idiot proof photo editing apps, like the one I used here, PicsArt.  It is an Android app, since my iPod circa 2006 is the only Apple product I own...yeah, yeah I know there are way cooler apps for Apple users, but that is an argument you will have to take up with my husband:) and besides, I really like PicsArt.  It's easy and fun.  My two major requirements when using technology.  However, don't ask me how I came to the finished product you see above as I really have no idea what I'm doing!  And it still produced a great picture...see...idiot proof.  Enjoy.

My Sweet Girl

Villanelle

Light a fire

I want to light it on fire,
watch smoke fall, ash rise.
Char the house of my desire.

It is a metaphor I think,
but no, for it is a real house
and I want to light it on fire.

Cracked foundation thin as wire,
iron bed before the wall red,
char the house of my desire.

Start with gasoline, dried leaves, tire
a crisp night to get a crackle,
I need to light it on fire.

This, my first time to conspire
with eyes that burn to witness
flames take the house of my desire.

Cursed house will play the witches pyre,
unbind my soul from the trunk of hell.
I am going to light it on fire.
Destroy the house of my desire.

This is a fun piece and one of my favorites to visualize.  It is a structured form called a Villanelle, where you have two refrains and two repeating lines.  The first and third line of the first stanza alternately repeat until the last stanza, which includes both repeated lines.  I think I like this form because it's roots lie in song. I would like at some point to put this to music and see where it leads me.

Probably the most famous example of a Villanelle is "Do not go gentle into that good night" by Dylan Thomas.  But my favorite is "Mad Girl's Love Song" by Sylvia Plath.

Eve as Hello Kitty

I don't believe I need to say much about this picture...it makes me so happy.